I don’t have to tell any of you how quickly the invention of the computer and the Internet has helped us manage our lives more efficiently both at home and at work. Technology is great, as we all know when it works. But are we really utilizing it to our full advantage?
First, lets take a look at positives of technology. The achievements in healthcare have been far reaching. From new amazing prosthetics to non -invasive life saving surgical techniques, and cures for many diseases .The creation of 3D printing and Cloud based AI services have all been amazing advancements as well.
The powerhouse invention, the computer and in particular the Smartphone has changed the world as we know it forever, and turned the world on it’s head. Just look how exponentially the web has grown. Has it brought the entire world closer together on a giant stage or has it methodically pulled us all farther apart?
We now have so much choice at our fingertips. We don’t even have to leave the comfort of our sofa to sign up for Yoga classes, download our new Audible book, plan our next Air B&B vacation or even order our groceries online. So what’s wrong with this you might say?
Nothing really, except that we seem to have lost ourselves and perhaps our real identities somewhat inside one of the most powerful advancements in technology of our time.
It’s not our use, but our overuse! Continually removing us from real personal social interactions. Have you ever tried talking to a live person when you have an issue with a company? You can’t even find a phone number under their Contact info. If you do, it simply redirects you right back to their automated guest service & back to their website. Round and round we go!
So how does this relate to our interaction with staff at businesses around us? I’ll give you an example. My wife was recently at a prominent high-end grocery store exchanging two containers of organic lettuce that were spoiled. She got to the Customer Service counter where she encountered a blank faced clerk who simply asked for her credit card so she could refund her purchase. There was no dialogue or any apology on behalf of the clerk who just happened to be the Customer Service Manager if you can believe it. Due to the deadly silence my wife felt as if she had done something terribly wrong by returning the lettuce. When she asked the manager if everything was ok she simply said that I’m returning your money, isn’t that what you wanted?
As a society, we have removed ourselves from the art of genuine communication. Emails and Texting have become the norm and the preferred way of connecting. They can be wonderful tools when used properly. But in life, sometimes we are forced to actually deal with another human being. I’m afraid some of us have lost the art of social communication by being gradually & methodically removed from it without even noticing.
How many times have you found yourself trapped in a texting conversation so long about such as important subject that your fingers start to cramp up! It’s crazy! People are breaking up their personal relationships by text and email, bullying each other and expressing their strong and sometimes offensive opinions online. Hiding behind every keystroke. The only person we seem to call these days is Siri!
I don’t believe the dialogue would be the same in person if we had to deal with the immediate reactions and consequences that we would face. This is how we have evolved in such a short period of time. Technology is a wonderful tool, but with respect to perpetuating the evolution of positive societal connection, my belief is that we’re gong to run into some issues unless we reduce our addiction to it.
Let me give you another example. You’re in your late 20’s, you just graduate from University with a Bachelor Degree in Business. Now it’s time to go out into the world and find your place. You have all the tools now right?
You can explain verbatim about the difference between Keynesian and free market economics but can you interact with your piers in the workplace? Can you read body language? Negotiate? Are you able to tell if someone is not quite telling the truth by the inflection or nervousness in his or her voice? When another team member calls you out in a meeting, how will you handle the situation? The answer is not very well I’m afraid.
You’ve never really learned how to play this game. It’s not something you can learn online from an App after all. Technology has given us the Easy Way Out from having to deal with these tough situations. How do we move forward as a race if we lose the real Art of Communication? I think it’s going to get worse before it gets better unfortunately.
Not only is the Internet desocializing us but its also shaming us, misinforming us and generally controlling us. It monitors and documents our every move & desire. Social Media does a really good job of helping us losing our sense of self: this is the last thing we as humans need help with! This has been well documented in many studies. However, the worst effect of social media and the smart phone is the fact that it’s reducing our sense of self-compassion, which can often result in depression and even suicide.
Ok, so that was heavy I know but it’s a frightening reality that nobody wants to deal with. It’s just so damn easy and fun for some posting & passive-aggressive comments online; for others, not so much I’m afraid.
So, you’re thinking, I already know all this. I’m not really telling you anything new, right? Well, you’re probably right but the main thing I want you to think about is, what are “You” as an individual going to do to stop adding fuel to this raging fire?
How do we stop this Social Disconnect from continuing and forever shaping our society? Have we gone too far? Is it too late to change our ways? It’s going to be incredibly onerous and a very tall task for all of us to get on board. We have to start with education. Focus on live interactive scenarios and more group discussion in the classroom and end with educating our children within the real world we live in.
We need to spread the word by example, plan more meet & greets, make more phone calls instead of texts when needed (and yes, on Mother’s day, call your Mom- Please, No Texting!). Don’t hide behind every keystroke! I know it’s way harder to take the time to communicate but in the end I truly believe that we will become a society filled with better people getting back in touch with our kindest and most forgiving attribute: Self compassion & Compassion and understanding for one other.